A Time I Thought About Ending My Life:
There have been many of those because they come with the territory when you're bipolar. I know I will have them for the rest of my life and with that knowledge it makes each time easier to get through.
I have only seriously attempted suicide one time - in 2003. I took a hand full of pills and ended up in the psych ward of the county hospital. It was one of the most horrendous experiences of my life. One thing I learned for certain that night was, if I ever attempt suicide again I'll make sure it takes that time because I'll NEVER want to end up in that place again.
I may contemplate ending my life on a regular basis, but I never will. No matter how hopeless things get I always remind myself that bipolar disorder is a cycle and eventually the feeling will go away. Plus, I have too much to live for and I haven't survived this long to end it now.
My half brother Zack died of an "accidental overdose" in 2001, so I know first hand how awful it is to lose someone to suicide. No matter how much I wanted to die I could never do that to my brother and to JD.
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